Dear Future Husband…

When I started my blog, I didn’t start it for people. I started it as an escape. A way to express myself. Having said all that, a lot of the things I used to write and still write about are a little too personal and so I don’t post them. But today, I want to share one of those

A part of me feels like I shouldn’t be sharing because I told myself a while ago I wouldn’t write about love. But oh well, here it goes.

I was thinking about something today. I remember someone telling me I was too young to think about marriage. I mean, I am young, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t see why I am too young to think about getting married. You see, I am the type of person who wants to start having my kids preferably before I get to 30. I know in this day and age it sounds pretty optimistic, but it’s what I want.

However, I was thinking about why exactly it is I want to get married, and even though I haven’t gotten to the bottom of it, I will share some of my reasons.

I want to get married because I want to have someone that I love totally and completely so much so that I want to share the rest of my life with. It’s a big commitment. I know to people of these days marriage isn’t, but to me it is. Do you know how amazing it is to find someone you love so much that you are ready to commit forever to? I mean, it may not always work out for some, but I think that type of love is something special. And I guess at the end of the day it’s not that I necessarily want to get married, it is that I want a love that I am so sure of that I am ready to commit the rest of my life to.

I want a person I can love completely and endlessly. I want someone I can love so much that the thought of submitting doesn’t make me cringe. Someone that I know that for better or for worse we are together, because yo, lets face it. In this day and age it’s pretty much for better. People bail at the smell of for worse. Nobody wants to stick around when things get tough. You see, more than the love, I want the commitment. Because to me that is just as important as the love. And it should be to you too.

Love is a funny thing, and on it’s own we tend to abuse it. We tend to misuse, underuse and disrespect this thing called love. We make fools of our selves foolishly all in the name of love. I can tell you because I have been there. I have been the girl who spends money she doesn’t have on a guy all in the name of love. I have been the girl who went against the things she believed in all in the name of love. And do you know the worst part of all these stories? All the people guys who have claimed over and over again that they loved me bar one, have all walked away when the going got tough. They loved me only when I was easy to love. They walked away when I was confused, hurting, unable…

This probably feels like a bit of a disconnect from where I started from, but let me tie it all together for you.

Now, maybe this is a flawed way of thinking, but I want to be married because I know, that when I get married, my husband will be committed to me. No, I don’t believe all men cheat, yes I know marriage is not easy, but more than that, I know that when I get married, my \”for better and for worse\” will definitely be for better and for worse, and I know that my spouse will love me when I am easy to love and when I am not. And more than that, he will be committed to loving me and making our marriage work.

So, I guess at the end of the day, maybe I shouldn’t be saying I want to be married, cause really, what I want is commitment, but I do (want to be married). And I don’t think I am too young to start thinking about it because I would rather think about it now, and know what I want for my marriage than wait till I’m 30 to start thinking about it.

You may not agree with me, but that’s fine, because we are all entitled to our own opinions and thoughts.

So dear future husband. It’s the 11th of December 2016, and I am thankful for you.

Photo credit: Photo taken from Ejike Emmanuel. Follow him on Instagram @ejikemanny

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